About Me







Working with people who struggle with sensitivity and depression
is not only a professional interest for me.  It is a personal journey
as well.  I know what it's like, because I've been where you are.

I grew up with family members whose high levels of sensitivity
and emotionality were expressed through depression, anxiety,
fears, over-eating, low self-esteem and crying. As an emotionally
sensitive child, I was more in tune with the emotions of those
around me than with my own.  I was compassionate towards
others' emotions and good at trying to make them feel better,
but I would cry easily and not be able to control it.

Others noticed my sensitivity and I would often get advice from
teachers and friends to "toughen up!  Don't let things bother you
so much."  This advice only served to make me feel worse about
myself.  

I couldn't consciously turn off my sensitivity.  It felt completely
out of my control.  I felt that I must just be weaker than other
people.  I know how awful this feels when you experience it as
well.

Others tried to help me by "babying" me.  While this felt good
and loving at times, it also isn't what I needed.  The care-taking
ended up reinforcing my over-sensitivity and the belief that I was
weak.  That seems like a common experience for my clients as
well.

Over the years I tried many ways of dealing with being too
sensitive.  I tried desensitizing myself by acting brave and doing
things that were scary or risky.  I tried willing myself not to cry
and to be "strong".  As you know these tactics weren't the
solution.

I tried to not care so much about others' feelings and what
others thought about me.  I tried to avoid conflict and prevent
any type of disagreement with others.  These techniques only
proved to distance myself from my own emotions, leaving me
feeling lost, lonely and depressed.  I know you can probably
relate to those feelings as well.

Finally, I reached out for help from a therapist and was able to
realize that instead of trying to get rid of my sensitivity, I could
learn to understand it better and use it as a strength instead of
experiencing it as a weakness.  I learned that I don't have to live
my life in fear of hurting others and being hurt myself.

Because of the freedom I've experienced in embracing who I am,
I am passionate about helping you do the same.  What I know to
be true now is that many times the things that seem to be our
greatest weaknesses end up becoming our greatest strengths.

I'd like to help you effectively make the shift from weakness to
strength in your life.
Jill Tan-Gatue, M.S., MFT
Marriage and Family Therapist, Lic. #43059
I am a licensed
Marriage and Family
Therapist.  I received a
Master's degree in
Marriage and Family
Therapy from Fuller
Theological Seminary in
Pasadena, CA.
Jill Tan-Gatue
200 E. Del Mar Blvd. #202
Pasadena, CA
91105

626-432-4022
ptan-gatue@juno.com